Happy Friday!
Fellow college students and professors, I hope you are surviving finals week or the beginning of it... And to the rest of my readers, I hope your Friday went as well as it could have.
This might come as a surprise but I'm actually writing this post on Friday. But I can already tell that this post isn't going to be very long because finals and I want sleep. This week was busy, long, and a struggle to get through. My one bright side that really helped me get through was I got hired as a student assistant with Rod Library Public Relations. So yay me!
Here's the link to my latest Odyssey article: 15 Animals Gifs To Get You Through Finals Week.
To all the people who don't feel enough:
I understand. And when I say that I understand, I mean it. I've been there. In fact, I face this feeling every day in way or another. So I'm here to tell you a few things.
First off: You. Are. Enough. Please listen to me when I say that you are worthy and you have worth. I know it's hard to believe it because you could give me so many reasons, so much evidence or proof as to why you don't believe in your worth. So when you happen to screw up or fall apart, you start connecting all the times it's happened before and you start to think you aren't enough. It's natural to feel this way and it's real easy to connect things because then we can make sense of something. But the thing about life is that it's messy and imperfect and most of the time doesn't make an ounce of sense. We are all trying to make it through and most of the time we don't know what we are doing; people just don't admit to this or don't realize they are even doing this.
Second: you're human. You're allowed to mistakes; in fact, it's even encouraged to make mistakes. You're allowed to feel angry, sad, depressed, happy, anxious, shy, and on and on; and you're allowed to express them. In society, in American society, in particularly, it's assumed that we need to have it together at all times, have your whole life figured out by age 8. And if we falter and break down, it's seen as weakness or "poor them" or "why don't they have their life together". But that's wrong. Everyone has their breaking point, when they don't want to or can't be strong anymore. This isn't a sign of weakness. It's a sign you've become exhausted and tired and you needed to let go. Some people plan their life out to a "T" but that doesn't mean you have to do the same. It's okay not have what you want to major in college figured out by the time you are 6 years old.
Third (and lastly): you can't control everything. If there's anything I've learned be being a control freak or perfectionist, it's that it gets exhausting and you'll burn yourself out real quick. And herein lies the problem, you can't be everything, do everything, and try to stay sane in the process. Something's got to give, and more often than not, it's your sanity that is lost and then you panic because nothing's going right and feel that everything and your life is out of control. While that might seem dramatic, for some people, I just described an everyday struggle they face. The simple fact is there are only very few things we have control over: our words, our body language, how we react, and what we do. Basically, I just described that you have control over you and your actions. Once you start letting go of what you can't control, you'll find it's easier to see the beauty in the world and it's easier to breathe it all in without the feeling of the whole world on your shoulder.
While I could go on, this feels like a good place to stop. Three things you need to repeat to yourself: "I am enough," "I'm only human and it's okay to not to be okay," and "I can only to do so much and that's okay". Is this a cure all? Nope, but it's a good place to start.
Signed,
Someone who's struggling, too.
Until next week,
Thought of the day
Happy Saturday!
I hope everyone got to enjoy the nice weather we are having. Whether it's a nice walk or bike ride or an early morning run, it would be a good way to treat yourself and get some vitamin D and maybe you can even get a slight tan.
Yes, I realize that it is Saturday, and I usually post on Fridays. I swear that I started this yesterday. With "dead week" coming up next week, I have a group presentation, a paper (already turned in!), two quizzes, and one final exam. So, no, I don't get a "dead week". On the bright side, I only have 3 finals during finals week, but on the not-so-bright side two of those finals are comprehensive. I'm trying to stay positive.
Here's the link to my latest Odyssey article: 5 Lies We Need To Stop Telling Ourselves.
As many of you know, I struggle with anxiety and OCD-like tendencies. Some days are worse than others. Some days I worry about the littlest things, the ones that other people normally don't think twice about. Oh, I couldn't find the book a patron is looking for, I worry. Oh, I have so much to do, I worry I won't be able to get it all done. Oh, my sister is driving back to college, I worry until I get a text that she made it back okay. Oh, a friend is hurting, I worry I won't say the right thing to help with comforting her.
Worrying is exhausting. Worrying is paralyzing. Worrying is panic attack inducing. Did I really lock my door? Not sure, so I better check for the 4th time. Do I really have everything or am I forgetting something? Double check to confirm that, yes, I do have everything. What I've learned is that is not me talking or thinking. It's actually my anxiety talking and taking control of my life. And while some worrying and stress is necessary to keep you motivated, but there comes a point when the worrying and stress and anxiety takes over your life and you may or may not realized it.
We need to take back our minds. We need to tell anxiety, "I acknowledge and understand your thoughts, but here's what we are actually going to do." We shouldn't suppress it or ignore it, because, one way or another, anxiety will find come back with vengeance. Is this easy? Hell no. I'm trying and trying and some days I succumb to what my anxiety tells me. Those days are harder to get through. What helps? It's more of a who. Your friends and family, the people who see you for the real you, who know when you're struggling against your anxiety and tell you, "You are enough," "You are winning," and "You are not a failure". Those people who inspire you to want to slowly learn how to acknowledge and understand what your anxiety is telling you but ignoring it and go with your gut. It's those people who are your own personal cheering squad.
Until next week,
Thought of the day
Happy Saturday!
I hope everyone has been well since I've posted last. Yes, I realize today's Saturday and I missed my usual Friday post. With three tests (in my hard classes, no less) this week, and two of them being on the same day, and a paper due, I prioritized creating flashcards and getting the paper done over my blogpost.
But after all my tests and general craziness, my sister will be coming to see me next Saturday! I will be holding onto that to get me through this week.
Society and other (older) generations began associating the word ‘stress’ to ‘college students’; it is almost as if they are bound together, or the cliché “you cannot have one without the other”. With almost two years experience, I know it to be true. Trying to balance classes, homework, work, clubs/organizations, studying, social life, and family time is (and continues to be) something I struggle with. Sometimes I say that I think I have a good balance, and then something random happens and suddenly I question myself if I really ever had a balance. While watching this documentary titled "Stress: Portrait of a Killer", it enlightened me in ways I had not thought about before and opened my eyes to what might be happening to my body and those close to me without me realizing it.
Probably my first exposure to stress comes from watching my sister and her struggles. When I was about eight or nine, my sister was diagnosed with OCD and anxiety. Of course, at the time, I did not understand what that meant, but as I grew up, I slowly began to understand what it was and how it affected her. It did not affect her body really until she went to college. Instead of gaining the “freshman fifteen,” she lost it and then some. In comparison to my college experience, it was quite similar. While my body does not respond to stress by losing weight, there have been many times when I felt like I faced so much stress in just about every aspect in my life and this still happens to me currently. My heartbeat quickens, thoughts are racing, hands are shaking, and sometimes my hands tremble. What I did not realize is how stress affects my body internally, because I only paid attention to what I could see on the outside. Realizing this gives me more motivation to find ways to ease my stress, which could hopefully in turn help me with controlling my anxiety and OCD. Knowing what I do it is opening my eyes to seeing it in others.
I have first-hand experience when it comes to seeing how stress affects others in low positions. When the documentary stated that low submissive positions are usually the most stressed group, I remember nodding at this part. My parents never had the opportunity to go to college, and both my parents worked multiple jobs to be able to provide for my siblings and I. As a little girl, I have a familiar image of my mom hunched over the table with receipts and bills scattered around her, trying to figure out a way to make ends meet money-wise. Now, I’m the same way: always stressing about having enough money to pay my bills.
Stress is the silent killer. We, as a society, have a tendency to overlook or ignore our mental health and its need to be taken care of. Why? A couple of likely reasons are that we cannot see it like we can see a broken leg needs a cast and we do not know how to best treat our mental health when it breaks. But ignoring it will come back to bite us in the end. We strike a balance between the good and bad stress and how to decompress when we are stressed to the point of feeling like we are suffocating.
Until next week,
Thought of the day
Happy Saturday!
Readers! I realize this post is a day late. I'll get to why that it is in a little bit. Hopefully you all had a good week, or if you had a bad one, I hope you could find something good in each day. Someone (the name escapes me, as I write this) once said, "Every day might not be good, but there's good in every day." Probably messed that up, but you get what I mean.
Okay. Why this post is a day late: it is spring break for me; I worked 33 hours this week which is more than I usually work in a week; I went to go see my sister and her boyfriend after I got off work yesterday. On Facebook, I see people posting pictures of spending their break down in the southern states or out of the country. Truly I am happy for them because if that's how they want to spend their break, then go them! I, on the other hand, started my break by spending time with family (and four-wheeling!) and playing Cribbage with my parents and grandma, then coming back to school to work because the car repairs can't be paid with smiles (although I wish it could; that would be so easy!), and I topped off my break by spending the night in with my sister and her boyfriend. Was it perfect? Maybe not, but it was ideal for me.
My most recent Odyssey article link: Not Everyone Grew Up the Way You Did.
My mentor, Ma (Marcia) Powell, has been and continues to be a blessing in my life. She's taught me a lot and helped me understand my anxiety and OCD-like tendencies, which in turn aided my thinking and how it needs to change and adapt to overcome those struggles. She's my rock when I'm in all-out freaking out mode and I need to be calmed down. One of the important things she's taught me: take mental health days, when you need them, not when you can find the time in your busy schedule.
You might be asking, "what in the world are 'mental health days'??" Please remember that my definition is different from someone else's. To me, they are the days we take for ourselves when we are so overwhelmed and exhausted or feel as if we are running on auto-pilot, and we need a day (or two) to recharge our brains and to give our mental health a chance to catch up.
Here's another way to look at it. Say you fall and break your leg; what do you do? Common sense tells you to go to the doctor for a cast and so you do. There, your leg can heal. But what do you do when your mental health needs a little T.L.C. (tender, loving care)? Mental health can mean a variety of things: whether you feel like yourself or not, or suddenly you feel so weighed down that you feel like you can't breathe. A doctor can't wrap your head and it would be better. Sure, if it works, you can go see a therapist or counselor to help you decompress ('decompose'...Rachel and Cody should appreciate that) and sort yourself out.
How we spend those days are important and unique to you and your particular needs, but what's just as important is knowing when you need to take one and understanding and being okay that it usually never fits perfectly into your schedule. Sometimes we need to get away and escape and recharge. Your mental health is just as important as your physical health is. We, as a society, have a tendency to overlook or ignore our mental health and its need to be taken care of. Why? A couple of likely reasons are that we can't see it like we can see a broken leg needs a cast and we don't know how to best treat our mental health when it's broke.
Until next week,
Thought of the day
