Formal dancing isn't hard, you just need the right partner

Happy Friday!

Guess what? I have some truly fantastic news for you. Want to hear it? You, yes, you might not have won the powerball, but you did survive the work week or for college students, the first week of the semester a.k.a syllabus week!

And you know what that means? Three words (two, technically): Treat yo' self. Me? I got myself some Panda Express and plan on binging on Parks and Recreation after I get done with this post. 

There are congratulations in order for a couple of couples. Recently, my best friend, Emily Boyd got engaged to her boyfriend Logan Bradley. It was absolutely precious! I better be at the wedding, so I can flirt with all the single guys and fail because I would be too chicken to approach them, but mostly I want to be able to tell you (Em and Logan) and everyone else how happy I am for you two and wish you guys the very best. And that if Logan hurts her, he'll have many people to answer to, specifically me. No pressure.

Also! My cousin, Sarah Nachtman got engaged to her boyfriend, Brian Buehler. I can't wait to hear the proposal story (I'm a sucker for those) behind it! At least I will be able to legally drink (I turn 21 this December! ...yikes?) by time the wedding happens, but in reality I can't wait to share in the day with you two. I have only met Brian a couple of times and one of those times was playing Wii bowling, and I can tell you that he's a good sport when he loses, just like the arguments he'll lose against Sarah. I'm kidding, Brian...only a little bit. He likes Panda Express, so that's a win for him. 

The first week is always stressful to me. It's the professors telling you, "Hey, here's all you have to do in 16 weeks: two big projects, four exams, ten quizzes, and five three-page papers." And your reaction is to sit and stare, trying not to cry. Another thing is that you would haven't got a routine down yet, which I'm all about routines. I'm trying to just take each day as it comes, and I'll eventually find my routine.

One of the classes I'm taking this semester is Ballroom Dancing. Okay, before you start your laughing fit or give me a strange look, let me explain a few things. One, I wanted to try Yoga, because I believed it would help me with strengthen my muscles in a different way and it would also help me with my anxiety and stress levels with learning to calm myself. Two, the Yoga class closed right as I tried to register for classes. So I had to rearrange my schedule yet again, and the others options seemed too intense for me. My thoughts were that if I couldn't get into that class, why not do something that will pay for itself later; answer: ballroom dancing.

I will be honest that I didn't take the class as seriously as I usually take my classes. Yesterday, I had my first taste of actual formal dancing. And it was way more intricate and complicated and serious than I thought. We started with the dance that is most known: the Waltz. If you don't know, this dance is between someone who leads and someone who follows. Makes sense so far? Good. Stay with me; I'll make my points soon enough.

So, my professor asks who will be which role, I immediately volunteer to be the follower. In unfamiliar territory such as formal dancing, Melissa was like, "Play it safe! Yes! I can be a follower!" So I did. But the thing about following? You have to be willing to have someone lead you. My partner literarily told me those exact words, "You have to let me lead." It didn't strike me until later what that meant. I'm so used to being the leader, consciously or unconsciously, and therefore, in control, and when I am forced to let someone have control, or share it, it's so very hard for me. This is one of the three lessons, so far, and reasons why this class will be beneficial to me: letting someone lead me for a change and/or let go of some control. 

Then in the middle of class, my professor threw me (and a few others in the class) for a loop when she said we couldn't look at our feet anymore. I was like, "WHAT?! But how will I know when to step and where to step??" It didn't occur to me until later what this meant. I had to just go with what my gut told me and hope that it will be right. Instead of thinking and worrying if I got the steps right, I need to just feel and let things happen as they do. It shouldn't be a surprise, knowing my anxiety and stress and OCD-tendencies, but it was hard and it will continue to be hard for me. Lesson/reason number two: forcing me to learn how to just do something by feeling instead of always thinking.

The third lesson I realized during class combines reason number one and two: a good dance partner is like someone who you are in love with and intend to marry someday. Why? You need someone will take the lead when you are scared, but you need to be willing to let that person to take control. Sometimes the roles are reversed and you need to be the leader. 

It's only the first week of the class, and look what I've learned from it. Also, this will pay for itself when I go to Emily and Logan's and Sarah and Brian's weddings! Ha. Clear the dance for me to show off. 

Until next week,

Thought of the day

 

There's a difference between "I love you" and "I'm in love with you"

Happy Friday!

Once again, you have made it through another week! Sadly for many college students, it's their last week of break, and classes resume on Monday. And you know what you should do, treat yourself; it's cheat day after all.

This week my life consisted of work, sleeping, and Parks & Recreation binging. While I will admit that I want another week of break, I'm ready to get back on schedule again. I can tell you right now that this will be a short post today, because I'm exhausted for some reason and hungry.

Here's the link to my latest Odyssey online article: Grades Do Not Define Who We Are.

For many big stores, the Valentine's Day flowers, chocolate, teddy bears that say "I love you", and candy was already put out shortly after Christmas or New Year's Day. My dad had the perfect reaction to this: what the frick? Anymore Valentine's Day lost the original meaning behind the day and now has become so commercialized that's it's a cliché and ridiculous holiday. 

To me, this day is sort of pointless because you shouldn't tell the special someone how much you love them and appreciate them for all that they do for you, etcetera only on February 14th. It's something I believe someone should do everyday but not going all out, obviously. I do get it if you want to do something a little out of the ordinary, but it bothers me when people go all out on this day. If I see people do that, it feels like they are trying to make up for all the times they missed out on. 

What I look forward to is that day after V-Day when all the chocolate and candy are all reduced prices.

A friend asked me for some relationship advice because they thought they still might have feelings for an ex-significant other, while, at the same time, starting to date and have feelings for another person. I told them, "I believe there's a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone. People often don't realize this for whatever reason." My friend eventually figured it out and thanked me for the advice.  

"I love you." Loving someone can apply to sibling relationships, parent-child relationships, friend-to-friend relationships, romantic relationships, and etc. This is more of an emotion or feeling.

"I'm in love with you." Being in love with someone is different. You are being specific. You are telling that one person that you have fallen for them. You are in a state of being. Which is being in love with that person.  

 Until next week,

Thought of the day

 

 

 

 

 

Stop always waiting for the other shoe to drop

Happy Friday!

and

Happy New Year!

Hello from me in 2016! I hope everyone enjoyed the journey into the new year. Let's hope people were smart when (and if) they drank to find another way to get home so there were little to no accidents due to drunk drivers. 

The Iowa Hawkeyes are letting the Stanford Cardinals run all over them in the Rose Bowl. After the third touchdown in the 1st quarter, we decided to watch something better than the crap show. I apologize if any of my readers are Hawkeye fans but they are not playing the best.

Not much is new in my life since the last time I posted. I will be going back to UNI on Sunday to work next week. Spending time with family is nice but sometimes there's a point when a person spends too much time with them. Similar to a family vacation: on the way to the destination is (usually) the fun part, but on the way back, everyone is usually sick of each other.

Here's the link to the latest in the Odyssey articles I've written: Cats Are Jerks During the Holidays and Being Single During the Holidays, As Told By Tina Fey And Amy Poehler. 

OH! Before I forget, I checked my final grades and I earned two A's, two A-'s, and one B+ which is a 3.74 GPA for the semester. After screwing myself over scheduling 2 humanities courses with all the reading that came with them, I'm proud of the grades I got. Was it worth all the stress? Maybe. Yes and no. It's up for debate.

Onto to today's topic. This is something I've noticed that I do and I imagine that there are others out there who are guilty of this. It's something that, once in the habit, can be hard to get out of the habit of doing. 

Living life always waiting for the other shoe to drop

Hi, my name is Melissa Curtis, and I'm guilty of living like this. When something good goes right (or the way you wanted/hoped it would) or someone comes into your life that you instantly know will change your life for the better and after coming down from your high, you stop to wonder, "Now what will go wrong for me?" 

Cinderella didn't. Her shoe slipped and she kept on running. I think what happens is that we recognize a pattern in our lives that when something we get something really wanted and then an event happens that makes us wonder why we get our hopes up in the first place. But what we fail to see is that up and down pattern we experience what life is. It's a rollercoster that is full of ups and downs, twists and turns, and any other sudden changes in direction. To be fair, it's easy to get caught up in our day to day lives and forget that.

I don't have any special advice or words of wisdom. Why? This is something I'm still trying to figure out for myself. If you have some advice, I would be all ears.

Until next week,

Thought of the day

  

Feeling 20 and ready for a new year and new resolutions

Happy Friday!

If you're reading this, you survived part one of the holiday season, and that is awesome. Go get yourself something for making it this far. 

Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah! Happy Kwanzaa! Happy Boxing Day! Happy what ever you celebrate, if you celebrate this time of the year!

This is my last blog post of 2015. So, I would briefly like to reflect about what this blog has done for me, what I learned, what this writing means to me and for other people. Kerra (my current roommate and future housemate!) sort of inspired me with her own blog to create my own. It took awhile to get the general layout and sometimes the topics were a little hard for me. This blog taught me that the "best way to cure writer's block is to keeping on writing even if you end rambling about how your cat likes to meow at random objects." Okay, so that never happened to me (at least, not yet...), but the point still stands. Keep on writing even if it doesn't make much sense. Recently, a friend from high school and who I talk to on a semi-regularly basis in collage pointed something out to me about my last post. He sent me the actual quote I was referring to, and he thanked me for writing my posts. Starting out (and for the future), I didn't care how much my posts were read; all I cared about is being able to write what happens to be on my mind that week. Thank you from my heart for reading! It means so much to me.

Yes, as the title suggests, I turned 20 on Monday. When friends and family ask me what I want for Christmas and my birthday, I never know what to say because I have everything I need/want: supportive, loving, sarcastic family and friends. The rest is replaceable if lost or destroyed, but the wonderful people in my life are not. From birth, to age 10, to age 20 (respectively), there have been many people coming and going from my life and there are many people in my life consistently and there are many people in my life currently. I'm grateful for each and everyone of them because they have knowingly or unknowingly shaped who I am today. Thank you, everyone.

With 2015 coming to a close and 2016 looming around the corner, many people are split: reminiscing all the good and bad about the year and looking ahead to the new year for all the changes we wish to implement. I don't think we think how much we do this. Perhaps you realized you aren't happy with the way you look, so you decide you want to eat better or walk 20 minutes in the morning. Perhaps you realized you haven't enjoyed the smaller and often go unnoticed moments, so you decide to slow down and take a deep breath of everyday life.

Reminiscing and looking ahead is in itself a paradox. Usually we do either one or another. For some, we live our lives always looking ahead or always looking behind or some even live their lives looking ahead to keep up and only looking back for guidance or past experience when we need advice. No matter how you live your life, it's almost impossible to not think about the past and look forward around the holidays. 

My challenge for you is to stick to your resolutions for more than just 2 weeks and incorporate the change into your day-to-day life. 

Until next time,

Thought of the day

 

Save one person; it doesn't matter if that person is yourself

Happy Friday!

Well, it's once again Friday. After the long week we have all had, we deserve a treat. 

I, as well as all other college students, definitely deserve a break after finishing finals and surviving the week from hell. Granted, there are many other students who had way worse week with tests, presentations, projects, speeches, etc.

FINALLY. I'm home with my kitty, my family (Rachel comes home tomorrow! EEK), the holiday decorations are up, holiday food will soon be made. There really is nothing else like coming home especially during the holidays. No classes, no homework, no studying. Or in other words, no stress.

Here's the link to my latest Odyssey article: An Open Letter to My Future Children. There is an error, but it's already been published. 

I can't remember where I saw this quote but it touched me in a way that it opened my way of thinking. So of course, I needed to find the quote, but I couldn't find it to my disappointment. It went a little like this: "Save someone. Just save one person. It does not matter if that one person is yourself." We often underestimate our actions when it comes to helping out others. We love to try to save everyone when in reality we are the ones drowning and needed saving. Family and friends try their best to help us, but we need to save ourselves. It's easy to become reliant on others to save us. If the only person you end up saving is yourself, then you succeed.

Some say that to save others, you must first save yourself. This is not true. Far from it actually. By doing the little things, saying the right set of words at the right time, etc., we don't always realize the effect that can have on someone's day, mood, life, and so on. And sometimes it's through saving someone else that we save ourselves or figure out a way to save ourselves. 

Until next week,

Thought of the day

 

  

Grades do not (and should not) define who we are

Happy Friday!

It's Friday, which means....the weekend! You made it! Treat yourself! (You probably deserve it, anyway.)

A brief update on my life: I have been feeling a little sluggish for a while, but I'm really trying to just get through each day. What helps are great co-workers, great roommate and/or friends, and naps. And the thought I'm almost done with the semester and I can enjoy some time away. 

Here's the link to my latest Odyssey article: 10 Movies To Get You in the Holiday Spirit.

Countdown to Christmas break: 7 days: 2 tests, 1 project, ? hours of work.

 I GOT THIS. 

Speaking of the dreaded finals week. There's something I think it's important and especially relevant this point in the semester to talk about. I came about this topic while I was having lunch with a friend. All semester she's struggled with a class and the terrible (and totally unhelpful) professor, and I listened to her vent (totally don't mind doing it). Without going into too much detail to be respectful, I said, "This will sound preachy, but your grade does not define who you are." It's true. I know how much work she did. I know how much effort she's made to learn the material. The grade she should get for all the time, effort, work she put into the semester is definitely (and significantly) higher than the one she's told me that she'll likely get.

The grades we get on projects, the grades we get on tests, the grades we get on assignments DO NOT define us. 

This is so important that I will say it again: the grades we get in a class do not define us and who we are. 

Grades do not define who we are as human beings. They do not define us, and we shouldn't let them. They do not know what a beautiful human you are. 

What matters isn't the grade, even though I will not deny the fact it's nice to see an 'A' on a quiz, you got; it's what you got out of the experience, what you learned is what matters. Now, I realize this is a hard concept to accept and enforce in your life.  

Why we put so much emphasis on grades is something that bugs me to no end. If someone, who worked really hard (and learned a lot), received a 'C+' then they deserve the same positive attention given to the person who, might not have worked as hard, received a 'A'. I believe it goes back to how our society today seems to love to judge by first glance and that's that. While I might not have proof to back this opinion up, this something that needs to be changed about our society.

Until next week,

Thought of the day

'Tis the season of giving

Happy Friday!

It's Friday once again, readers! And I'm just going to say it. FINALLY. This week seemed long, and I'm glad it's over...for the most part. I hope everyone had a good week, and if they didn't, I hope you have a relaxing weekend. 

A quick update on my life. It's been stressful this past week, and next week and the following week will be the same way. But after my last final on Thursday, I will be officially done with the semester! THEN CHRISTMAS BREAK.

Here's the latest articles I've published on The Odyssey Online: 10 Things College Students Are Thankful For and Life Lessons In How The Grinch Stole Christmas.

Countdown until Christmas break: 14 days.

Onto today's post topic. There is a couple of things I wanted to talk about but with they sort of overlap so I will just combine them in one big monster post.

A past professor posted a status about one of her students receiving some terrible news and asking for prayers. This status made me stop to rethink my week. While I was on the struggle bus all week with allergies and stressing over projects and tests, this student received the worst news so close to Christmas. As college students nearing finals week, we often get caught up between studying, procrastinating, complaining about our finals, worrying and stressing over tests, and other things. And we forget that others around us are facing bigger challenges than a test or project. I'm not saying that's a bad thing; I know all too well of just trying to get myself through the days and not thinking about others and their struggles. 

This is the season of giving and being thankful. My mom always told me that classic line "it's better to give than to receive". As a wee child, I didn't understand it, but as I have grown over the years, I realize it's true. Giving someone a gift, whether it's homemade or bought from a store, and seeing their eyes light up because they are surprised and overcome with joy is one of the most amazing feelings, in my opinion. It's one of the reasons why I love giving people gifts because when I get the chance to make someone's day with something they really wanted or always wanted (and maybe couldn't afford to buy it) or something they need, I love when their eyes light up, they have a huge grin on their face, and generally look like they are on cloud nine. 

To tie back into the first paragraph, I have only recently understood that "it's better to give than to receive" doesn't only apply to physical items but also to non-tangible items like praying for someone who needs it or listening to someone vent if they had a bad day or giving someone a hug if they look like need one and so on. So instead of worrying about my problems, I will take the time to pray for anyone needs it, listen to anyone who needs a listening ear, and give anyone a hug who needs one.

Until next week,

Thought of the day